Motherhood Begins At 2am

“It is 2am. I’m awake because today is the 14^th day after my ovulation. I will be peeing on a pregnancy test in the morning but I’m so nervous. It’s been over one year of trying to conceive and I really don’t know what I’ll do if I see that ugly red line again. I’ve been feeling a little tingle in my tummy all day, could that be my period coming, or is that an early sign of pregnancy? Would tomorrow be one of the happiest days of my life or a continuation of my nightmare? I just want to be a mother. Is that too much to ask?”

*********

“It is 2am. I am 37 weeks pregnant and I am exhausted. I can’t sleep because the baby is kicking so hard. I love him so much but at this point, I’m over it. I need to use the bathroom, AGAIN; I am hungry, I have heartburn and, thinking about it, I’m angry too. Angry at my husband who is snoring peacefully beside me, angry that he would never experience or understand how I feel right now no matter how hard I try to explain. I really need this baby to come out. I just want to go into labor right now. Is that too much to ask?”

*********

“It’s 2am. My little one is in so much pain. Colic. I’ve tried everything to get her to settle but it’s not happening. She’s in pain. I can tell by the sudden movements of her legs and the loud wail that follows. I’ve tried everything. I’m exhausted. Maybe I shouldn’t have had a baby, maybe I’m not cut out to be a mother because a good mother always knows what to do right?

I just want the pain to go away. I just want her to sleep. Is that too much to ask?”

*********

“It’s 2am. I’m currently seated in the living room with my toddler and we are singing along to some of his favorite songs.

It’s an odd combination of Pinkfong’s “Baby Shark” and Maverick City x Elevation Worship’s “Jireh”. He’s happy, he’s waving his hands in the air, he looks content but I’m not. I just need to SLEEP!!!!

Is five hours of uninterrupted sleep too much to ask for?”

*********

“It’s 2am. My daughter is screaming her head off because she wants a feed. I’m tempted to give in but she has been weaned. It’s been fifteen months of breastfeeding thrush and enduring the chewing, biting, and – if I may say so myself- glorious abuse of my nipples in a bid to nourish the child my body grew.

I’m tempted to give in but that would mean going back to square one. My saggy breasts are tired and don’t look as firm as they used to – It bothers me but I try to tell myself it doesn’t.

I just want to be the sole owner of my not-so-firm breasts again. Is that too much to ask for?”

*********

“It’s 2am. I can’t sleep. I have a proposal to submit at 9am. I have a truckload of laundry piled up, three days worth of unwashed dishes, the bathroom needs cleaning and I haven’t vacuumed the house in two weeks. I have a toddler who sleeps at 9pm and wakes up at 5am.

God!! I’m exhausted. I need a break. I’ve forgotten how to live, how to breathe, how to be me. I need a break!!!

Is a weekend away from home without having to worry about my job, my chores and my child too much to ask for?”

*********

No mama, it is not too much to ask and you are not alone.

Mothers never seem to catch a break and even when we do, we feel guilty about neglected duties. We beat ourselves up mentally and say “maybe I’m not cut out for this”, “I should work harder” or “I’m a bad mom”

Mama, remember that you are human first before anything else.. It’s okay to be tired, it’s okay to need a break, it’s okay to take a break.

If you need a break, take it. If you need help, ask for it.

Do you know that every time your little one looks at you and smiles, that’s evidence that you are doing the absolute best for your baby? Your little one knows it, appreciates it and says “thank you” with a smile.

Do not let the struggles cause you to miss out on the joys, the laughter and the priceless moments. Motherhood begins at 2am and truth be told, it never ends. This is your life now; embrace it.

We implore you today to walk into a store and buy a shirt that says I AM A BADASS MOM because you are.